Being The Newbie – by Seraphim Vega

Since January 2013, the South African Vampyre Alliance adopted a polling system to select new members from the community, nominated by current members, and then debated and voted on internally before extending invitations to these candidates. The SAVA recently welcomed several such new members, and they have been asked to prepare short articles on their experiences and thoughts on being Vampyres, being part of the Vampyre Community and on entering the SAVA. In this article, we hear the thoughts of Seraphim Vega.

Seraphim Vega: (Note that upon reading this article I give you permission to do the notorious ‘face palm’ motion as many of you may about my introduction to the SAVA as well as my so called ‘experience’ of being a vampyre thus far. I’m always brutally honest, so please remember this.)

With regards to the SAVA, I was ‘lucky’ enough to have such a warm welcoming by Kay Valkir Noctem; she acted in a manner expected of any vampyre community by allowing me just the right amount of information to become intrigued whilst remaining slightly cautious – which of course is expected.

She spent a great deal of time answering any questions I had and in turn was granted my undying respect – a fine example to which many should strive. I met and chatted to various individuals from vastly differing religions, mindsets and mannerisms and then had to wait for the dreaded time to pass before my application was even considered… being impatient and hungry this was no easy task.

Upon my entry into the SAVA, I became enthralled by the amount of dedication put together in the forums by Octarine Val Valur as I personally know how much effort goes into creating such a database of information – very admirable and extremely impressive. However my perception was that in general the community likes to dwell in its own world; and regardless of the amount of effort placed by a few, there lacks a sense of comradeship per se’.

Many individuals sit idly in membership without actively aiding in assisting SAVA’s progress. So my questions to those are… what’s your excuse? Why are you here? What are you doing about it? You have been given a vast array of channels for communication and outstanding leaders – take any organization, civilization or ecosystem for that matter; supply it with outstanding capabilities for growth and it will merely stagnate if every single individual does not participate. So upon reading this, I trust that many of you will reflect upon this, it is your community – its fate rests with each and every one of us and if it matters not to you, perhaps you are mistaken about your identity or you are here for the wrong reasons.

On to my personal experience: I’m sure many of you know by now that I’m not entirely the most typical example of a Gothic-looking vampyre. (I’m a fluffy, bright colors type of girl, viewing the world in rainbows and have an extremely open persona); but it has pretty much always been part of my life. It is a core aspect of who I am that goes beyond the constructs of attire, behavior and mannerism.

As a sanguine feeder I’ve always felt this intense desire – in a sense passed down by genetic coding that has always been felt more strongly when enveloped in darkness… a comfort behind the energy in the still night air. If I were to perhaps call it anything I’d say it is somewhat primal – raw and pure!

I find that this is largely due to my upbringing by my very influential mother who is a spiritualist and who raised me from birth to be aware of the realms around me and be open to all things in life; I’m sure not many children were raised to associate with other realms from birth, acquiring various techniques of natural healing and some other ‘frightening aspects’, however whatever the case I have always dealt with the typical enticement and cravings that many of us face as well as the problems associated with such.

Due to such an early engagement with accepting of who I am I was in essence able to grasp a maturity far beyond that of my age as well as living by traits of loyalty, respect and honesty above all else. This in essence has molded me into someone without fear, without the need to hide behind an artificial name, to present myself as myself.

I accept the darkness as it were; the amazing beauty behind it and with my  background in psychology, I feel that it is in inherent disposition rather than an abnormality in one’s self. A disorder in actuality is generally only recognized when it hampers the inherent ‘normal’ functioning in day to day life and I live just as any other human does, so I really don’t feel any inclination to associate it with such terms viewed by mainstream psychologists.

I will however state that with this ‘ability’ it can be extremely destructive and if I were to give any advice to the general community – familiarize yourself with who you are; merely suppressing this will not aid you but merely postpone your ‘destructive bubble into popping’ as an analogy. Face that which you are every day and embrace it with a sense of control. You alone are in charge of who you are and who you will become.

This is a gift not a curse: personally I have found that through this journey people fixate on who I am easily, they are attracted for an unknown reason, they open up more freely and easily and I often find that many will embrace me with their life stories for the mere fact of who I am – not to mention that animals in general adore our kind. It has had an incredible effect on whom and what I have become, and helped tremendously in the field of study I am involved in.

For the most part (at least in relationships I’ve had) it does somewhat deter your average naïve person but I’ve found most to be tolerant of the idea or concept at least. I’ve found that being extremely open about the concept of living as I do as simple as “I am a vampyre, I enjoy feeding, the reason being xyz. If you’d like to know more please feel free to ask” most people then decide in their own minds right there and then that there is truly nothing wrong with the life I lead; that I’m a normal person living a unique lifestyle. I can still make them laugh, smile and feel loved just like any other.

The moment you educate a person about an issue they feel more at ease and tend to be more willing to understand you. Sure you’ll get the occasional few that run for the hills, but the manner in which I approach the subject ensures that generally it has no significant play in the friendships or relationships I create. That cannot simply be defined by one construct but rather by a multitude of constructs based on a multitude of experiences. You’ll find that the people who are willing to accept you for who you are, are the only ones who really matter – with that in mind I have no issue discarding 1000 stones to find a single pearl. I can honestly say that I’ve never faced extreme hatred towards me based on the construct of being ‘vampyre’ – even if I do will that change me? The answer is simple – No it won’t! It will also ensure that I am surrounded by individuals who accept me for who I am rather than wasting my time on those who’s ‘energy’ really is more of a toxin than a means of feeding.

With all this said, understand finally that living in the ‘light’ as I do with no fear is perhaps something many of you are not ready to face, or that which the community is not ready to embrace – remember there are many valid reasons as to why the minority often needs to ‘dwell in the shadows’ as it were – I find that society is not accepting in general and in this fast-paced world, my perceptions are that one of two things will happen: either we will move extremely fast towards a boundless environment in which we all are able to live freely, or we will find ourselves in an environment filled with all-out hostility against us – so before the choice is made, make sure it is the right one for you.

Thank you once again Kay Valkir Noctem for opening the way for me to become involved more closely with others like me and I will always cherish the second name given to me by you. You have my respect.