Most of modern vampire-fiction hype is the morbid obsession with the Vampyre-mundane lovers, star-crossed and doomed – with the inevitability of the mundane eventually being ‘turned’, despite the vampyre’s pained and tormented pleas derived from the dis-satisfaction with his own existence. Now a cliche aimed at teens – and disturbingly enough, gathering a huge following from middle-aged women, everyone wants a vampyre lover – but among real Vampyres, is the Vampyre-mundane relationship as romantic as it is made out to be?
Most vampyres do not make their existence known, and hide the constant need for blood and energy from the world to avoid being “socially staked”, so to speak. However, when one enters a relationship, it becomes harder to hide this secret and there is the ever-present, underlying feeling of paranoia, and the guilt of having to lie, or ‘lie’ by omission. Many of us will know that even approaching this subject, and trying to justify and reason with an unsuspecting mundane will send them running for the hills, screaming about insanity.
Every now and then we may be blessed with a partner who may love us enough to accept anything about us, no matter how twisted and sickening the rest of society may view it – and that is all very well and nice in theory, but is it enough for us?
From experience, I know too well the awkward tension of that terrible statement: “If you believe in it, then that’s great”, which translates to: “Go on believing your delusions, darling”, and to have a lover who knows you identify as a Vampyre, but who does not believe in vampyrism, is demeaning to our existence.
Vampyres, most of whom are proud and arrogant by nature, will scarcely happily tolerate one who does not believe in them, and certainly not anyone who dares to view our beliefs with amusement and scepticism, aiming to make us feel foolish and childish at every opportunity.
Even the more open-minded, ecclectic minds may not always be able to conceive and understand the extents of the characteristics of our being and thus we are left feeling alone, without our lovers being able to relate to us entirely, which is critical to every long term relationship.
Everyone wants to be able to openly share every aspect of their daily lives with somebody special to them – not just the bits and pieces that are considered “normal” – and one should certainly not have to avoid talking about certain aspects or have to feel awkward about their vampyrism, as it is a huge part – if not the focal point, of our lives.
Not too long ago I read a thread in a online vampyre forum with people debating this very topic, and it would seem that there is a general agreement that Vampyre-mundane relationships generally leave the Vampyre feeling unfulfilled. Few Vampyres seem content having a long-term relationship with a mundane, but due to the fact that kin are far and few between, many settle for “second best”. Others, while feeling the general sense of lacking in their relationships, may stay with their mundane, for the reason that they receive love and acceptance from that person and feel it is the best they may find, and therefore cling to it, trying to deny their unhappiness in that relationship.
On the flip-side of the coin – how well would two Vampyres fare together in a long-term relationship? Unfortunately, I cannot speak from experience but from looking at various characteristics of the majority of our folk – their selfishness, arrogance, self-centred behaviour, and neediness – would there really be enough space for two people exhibiting such traits in one relationship? Would it not become a constant battle, rather than a mutual understanding? Would two hungry vampyres be able to tolerate each other in times where the period between feedings are long?
Perhaps this is where the idea of the solitary vampyre comes from? Many of us already keep our “other lives” hidden from friends and family – but if we are to hide from our partners as well, then we are truly alone in this world.