Ronin At Heart, Ronin No More, by Kay Valkir

By Kay Valkir, Ilyatha Halo: Every journey has a beginning, this is mine. When I discovered I was a Vampyre I was quite shocked, afraid, confused and inevitably lonely. So the first thing I did was desperately search all over wap sites (as I could only access internet via my phone at the time) and found a so called true Vampyre forum site (which I shall not name), obviously I had to join.

I introduced myself, not knowing what to expect being a new vampyre. I was shot down, told I was a poser/ roleplayer because I said that I hadn’t had blood at that stage yet, because I wasn’t ‘turned’. And so the offers started roling in, “vamps” offering to turn me and another one that was very memorable as he said “he was as old as time”.

Being very green or wet behind the ears if you will, I didn’t know what to believe, and for a time I was very convinced that maybe it WAS just all in my head and that they were right.

Jumping forward a couple of years, after my love affair with cutting (and drinking my own blood), after having a girlfriend who was my very first (and so far, only) Donor – then losing control – enough that I lost both Donor and my reputation in my small town due to my Donor telling everyone what happened and what I am, I struggled alone for a while after that, vowing to never drink blood again.

Even when I had my girlfriend/Donor I still felt alone, and eventually I accepted that it may just be a part of the ‘curse’ of being a Vampyre.  I began walking a path of self loathing.

As time went on, I grew to love being a ‘ronin’ and accepted that I would walk this path alone. Even now, I prefer to keep to myself and quietly observe, only putting in a word where I feel it will count.

Up until 2 months or so ago, I thought I was the only sang Vampyre in this country – which, I know of course, is statistically impossible – however, I had no proof to tell me otherwise.

Then a good Pagan friend of mine asked me a rather silly question: “Are you still a Vampyre?” To which I answered yes. That one word opened a door to the SA VC, and led me to the first and only real Vampyre group I have seen – and this friend brought this to my attention.

Now that, as you can imagine, was quite a shock to me after giving up the search for sane vampyres a long long time ago. Not only were there other Vampyres in this country but even more awe inspiring, was the fact that they were organised and that there are so many of them. I was amazed to discover there was another Vampyre living in a neighbouring town.

And so my journey in the SA VC began. I somehow managed to get up enough courage to join a House, and can confidently say I am no longer a lonely wondering ronin. I am now Kay Valkir of House Lilitu and I am proud to say I belong to a group of Vampyres dedicated to helping the lost and confused out there. I am a ‘ronin’ no more!

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About Octarine Valur

Octarine Valur - Founder: House Valur, South African Vampyre Community, South African Vampi(y)re Alliance (SAVA), SA Vampyre news (SAVN). View all posts by Octarine Valur

2 responses to “Ronin At Heart, Ronin No More, by Kay Valkir

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